So, a lot of us have issues forming viable wings. The nature of the game matchmaking and instance loading is complicated. Very often, we can't fully instance (see & fly with others).... as the game engine puts us into separate versions of the same area. The solution may be port forwarding.
Port forwarding is basically having an open port on your internet connection dedicated to E:D. Fdev claims it can improve (instancing) success by 15-20%. My experiments within SINC = I can fly with 25-35% of members (which is an improvement, as many of you know).
This is a basic guide; your experience may vary (depending on router/ISP). This applies to both Xbox, PC and Mac versions of the game. Hope this helps new and older players alike!